My Neuro Didn't Ditch Me!!!!!!

I'm SO excited...

I had my follow-up appt. with my Neurologist today after my EMG and sleep study. I was fully expecting him to say "It's all in your head - get lost!" (At least that's what my 1st Neuro. said - no wait...he said it was STRESS! )

My Neuro, instead, said - "I want to see you again in 3 months!" He gets it! He really, really gets it! Anyway, he said that my tests came back "unremarkable." He said that he is always happy when he doesn't find any immediate damage, but he also acknowledged that the current findings do not help me with what I'm going through. He let me know that he will continue on helping me to get answers.

He said that he didn't want to do anymore testing right now, which I said was GREAT with me! I've been feeling better lately, with the exception of some fatigue and that darn burning sensation (YAY!), so he said that he wants to see me in 3 months again. If I'm fine at that time, he wants to see me in 6 more months...then 9 more, etc. Of course, if I take a turn for the worse, he said that he definitely wants to see me as soon as something else happens.

He also upped my Neurontin dosage to 1200 mgs. per day (400 mg x 3). This should help take the burning sensations away hopefully. He did say that he still cannot rule out MS. He just can't prove anything at this time. He told me that I am still young and that he wouldn't expect much damage at this point in someone my age anyway. He said that is why he wants to continue seeing me - to keep track of any potential damage that may occur over time.

I'm glad that he is taking me so seriously. I hate that I still don't have any answers, but I'm "cautiously interested" to see what happens in the near future. I fully expected for him to send me packing, but it's just so great to have a doctor who's working for ME!

Oh! My sleep study! It was horrible and I never want to do anything like that ever again. I had 24 electrodes attached to various parts of my body, all with wires attached. They told me I could sleep on my sides, but that was near impossible. Seeing as how I am purely a side and stomach sleeper, this was sheer hell on me! Best part? They come in and ask me if I'm ready to wake up "that morning." I said OK if I didn't have a choice. As they were yanking electrodes (and skin and hair) off, I ask what time it is...5:45 AM!!!!!!!!! ARRRRHHHHH!!!!!! It's freakin' Saturday morning, dude...why are you waking me up so daggone early!?!

Anyway, it's over with...they said that I had no problems sleeping - DUH! I could have told them that!

What else...our good friends, Johnie and Angie, got married on Saturday. Beautiful wedding - FUN reception! We were able to catch up with some old friends that we haven't seen since OUR wedding 7 years ago! It was a lot of fun, and I really enjoyed getting to get out and have some fun ADULT time.

Finally, my great aunt died over the weekend. She had an aneurism, and she had refused to undergo surgery to fix it. She was 80 years old and after about 4-6 months with this aneurism, it finally took her life. She went very peacefully. Please just pray for her immediate family, they are having a difficult time right now.

I *think* that's it...a lot going on lately. Whew!

Doctors, Schmoctors!

Tax season is officially OVER with as far as I'm concerned!! I got away this year with filing only 1 extension for 1 client....I'm so geeked!! Now, though...quarterly payroll taxes are due by April 30th, so the race begins for those.

This was a *REALLY* busy weekend. First off...my EMG testing was on Friday. They told me it would last for an hour...3 hours later, I was finally finished. A medical tech did EXTENSIVE nerve studies on my right side (arm, leg, neck), and then Dr. Fee came in to do the EMG - the needle part. He checked quite a few different muscles including one in my face (!!!).

After the test, he told me that he would see me during my follow-up appt. on the 25th where we would discuss other symptoms, etc., but as for the EMG's, he said that he could see "borderline issues...but the picture as a whole wouldn't allow [him] to make any kind of call at this point." DUH!! He also said that the 13 pints...I mean, vials...of blood that they took during my last appointment netted a few "borderline" issues, but again, the picture as a whole wouldn't allow him to make any call. I'm sorry, please hold your ears if you are easily offended, but WHAT THE HELL DOES BORDERLINE MEAN!!!! And if there are so many freakin' borderline issues, why can't you put them together and call it something??!!??

So...next step is the sleep study (aka, a good night's sleep for me), and then I go to see Dr. Fee again on the 25th. I'm sure he's going to say that he cannot make any calls on anything one way or another right now and that he has run out of tests to do for now. That is fine and dandy with me; however, it's sad that it's literally going to take something BAD happen (aka, lost vision, loss of control in legs/arms, etc.) for someone to figure something out!

As of now, I am feeling a bit better. My fatigue and weakness has eased up to some degree. My eye twitching has also eased up to some degree, although I still am experiencing a lot of blurred vision. I'm left right now with that pesky burning stuff in my leg and neck, and it has now moved over to the top of my left arm. Blah! Also, I'm pretty certain that my bladder isn't functioning correctly, although I SO don't want to tell him that in the fear that he is going to send me to a Urologist!! Sorry to be so graphic, but I can tell that my bladder doesn't empty all of the way anymore...(leading to all of the stinking infections I've had despite killer antibiotics!). Grrrrr...THIS SUCKS!!!

But...I'm hanging in there, just like every other time. Don't get me wrong...I seriously doubt that Dr. Fee is going to ditch me or anything. He understands and acknowledges that there is something going on with me...he's just not able to prove anything right now. I suppose what he will say is to call him if/when I have another bad attack again so that we can repeat MRI's, etc.

Otherwise, we had a wonderful Easter! I completely blew my diet, but it's OK...those cheddar grits my aunt made were to DIE FOR! Got lots of cute pictures of the girls in their pretty little dresses. I'll post all about our day yesterday and post some pictures tomorrow...

Oh, and I lost 2.6 more lbs. at Weight Watchers...so I'm down a grand total of 5.8 lbs. now! Woohoo...yippee...yay... Why can't I snap my fingers and have 28 lbs. drop off???

OK, OK...Here's the Update! : )

It's been a hectic week or so. Lots of good, bad, fun, aggravating things going on:

1. Tax season is drawing to a close...that means that I get phone calls at least once or twice a day from people saying "IT'S ALMOST TAX DAY...CAN YOU FIT ME IN???" Grrr... Don't get me wrong...we can CERTAINLY use the extra cash right now, but I just wish that people would look at their calendars every now and then. ; ) (Scale = Aggravating)

2. We had the extreme pleasure of having our good friends, Jamie and Jada, spend the night with us this past Friday night. We took the girls to see the Disney Princesses on Ice, and the show was FABULOUS! I even felt like a kid again!! I'll post some pictures of the girls and from the show as soon as I can. Maddie and Jada wore their Cinderella gowns and crowns to the show. The evening was wonderful, but it was kind of dampened by a severe storm that came through as we were leaving. Even THAT didn't dampen the spirits of the girls, though! (Scale = FUN!) The girls played together SO well, and Jamie and I just sat and talked and talked and talked, which was very fun.

3. This morning, I was driving along a little country road that leads to the highway, just listening intently to a song on the radio ("Because of You" by Kelly Clarkson - what a heartbreaking song!). Suddenly, I see lights flashing behind me! Where in the HECK did that stinking cop come from anyway?? So yeh...I get a stinkin' ticket! I was doing 54 in a 35 mph zone...he knocked it down to 45 in a 35, though. Guess he liked me. HA! Anyway, the sucky part was that I was the last in a line of 5 cars that were all going the SAME SPEED! I just happened to be last in line, so I got it. Oh well...I did it, so I have to pay...simple as that. I'm pretty sure I was framed, though. : ) The thing is that I wasn't even paying any attention to what speed I was going. Simple things like that don't occur to me anymore. My brain apparently melted out my ears while I was taking a shower at some point or something. Bah! (Scale = BAD!)

4. I get to get poked, prodded and SHOCKED on Friday. Not looking forward to that - EMG testing. The good part of it is that Phil told me that since he will be home with the kids, he wants me to go and get my hair done after the test. I'm going to get it cut and probably COLORED (for the first time since I was a teenager) because I'm getting really gray in the front on my hair. I have gift certificates to the salon and day spa, so I might sneak a massage in there, too. I DESERVE IT!! (Scale = Semi-Good day ahead)

In other news...my Mom is holding on with her Chemo cream treatment. Her face looks like it's burned badly, and it's pretty swollen in places. She ends the treatment, hopefully, on Friday, and she goes back to see her Dermatologist then. She is HORRIBLY afraid that they are going to tell her that she has to do the treatment for more weeks. (It's usually a 6 week treatment, but they are treating hers "aggressively" for 2 weeks.) Please just pray that she will be done at this point. I don't think she can take too much more of it - it's horribly painful for her, too.

My Dad's surgery is scheduled for May 2nd...please also pray that it would go as well as possible for him.

Finally...we have sent out 6 resumes so far for Phil...please pray that someone(s) might call him for an interview soon.

I'm doing OK...still lots of burning going on in my right leg, and now it's moved to the back of my neck. It's REALLY aggravating! I assume that Dr. Fee will UP my dosage of Neurontin since this theoretically should not be happening on this drug.

So that's it in a NUTShell. I'll post some pics of the girls as soon as I get a chance...

Dates, Times and Other Fun Stuff...

Here are the dates of my upcoming tests and Neuro appointments:

April 16th - EMG testing at UK Hospital - 12:30 PM
April 21st - Sleep Study at Good Samaritan Hospital - 9:00 PM (all night)
April 25th - Appointment with Dr. Fee - 11:20 AM

These tests that I'm doing are to further rule out other problems. He wanted to reperform the EMG testing to be sure that there's no nerve or muscular damage that is causing the problems. (There's not...I've already been there, done that with this test). He also wants to rule out sleep disorders. So that means I just get a nice night's sleep without being woken by children. HA!

Overall, I seem to be feeling a bit better, yet every time I say that, something else happens. Right now, I just have some "minor" aggravations - mainly dizziness and a burning leg. My right leg has been BURNING like it's sunburned (it's not, of course)...but at the same time, it seems cold. Very weird sensation. Actually, it's gotten to the point today where it's pretty painful.

In research news...there's been yet another study linking Epstein-Barr Virus to MS. It states that people with EBV (aka, ME) have more than double the risk of a normal person to develop MS. I've always figured that anyway...

In FUN news...my good buddie, Jamie and her beautiful little girl, Jada, are coming to stay with us tomorrow! Our very first house guests at our new house!! We are taking the girls to the Disney Princesses on Ice show tomorrow night...we're going to dress the girls up in their Princess costumes and let them go in those. I'm sure they'll LOVE doing that! I'll let you all know how it was.

In kid news, just thought I would share the grown up thing that Maddie said last night. We were going to the grocery, and she kept trying to roll the window down. I rolled it back up and put the window lock on so she couldn't roll it down anymore. She keeps grunting and groaning before finally saying, "Oh Mom...I'm SO frustrated!!" Where does she get these things anyway???

That's it from here...better sign off...

A Tiny Splash of Good News...

I told you all about the Home Staging and Redesign course I'm taking...well, I submitted my first unit of homework for grading (6 chapters of exercises) a couple of weeks ago.

Got it back yesterday - got an A!!!!!!!! And it said, "EXCELLENT!" next to the A!

YAY!!!!

On to unit 2 now...

What's Happening???

I'm not liking myself these days too much. I don't remember anything anymore...I don't feel the same anymore...I can't lose weight like I used to anymore...things are just getting far more complicated. I want to be a kid again!!!

I am forgetting SO much, it's really scary. You know, I always had "Mommy brain" ever since my kids were born - forgetting things, wondering why I walked into a room, etc., but now it's become completely overwhelming. The latest fiasco is that I completely forgot about my friend's twin girls' birthday party. I even had the invitation taped to my fridge so that I could remember. I sat there on Saturday thinking that I had absolutely nothing to do, and then Sunday night at 9:30 PM...I remembered.

Tammy, if you're reading (and if you haven't completely abandoned me as a friend yet, which I would completely understand if you did)...I am SO sorry! I was SO looking forward to it...I just keep beating myself up because it's not like me to forget things like this.

*sigh*

In other {bad} news...Phil lost his job on Friday. It wasn't his fault, but I completely lashed out at him as if it were. His boss came in and told Phil that he had made more money than he (his boss) did last year. He couldn't afford to keep him around, so he's out. He did give him a nice little severance check, and he will be getting unemployment.

But what's happening? Why is everything going to HELL all of the sudden? My health is going to HELL! My parents' health is going to HELL! My husband's job and part of our financial well-being is going to HELL! Just when we get ahead financially, something always happens! WHY??

So I sit here a mess...I'm dealing OK, I think. (Do you think?? LOL!)

I started back to Weight Watchers the Friday before last. I need to lose 28 lbs. again. I did it the first time a few years ago in about 16 weeks...this time, it's gonna take awhile. I only lost 1.8 lbs. at my first weigh-in last week, and I was very disappointed. The last time I joined before I got pregnant with Mackenzie, I lost almost 5 lbs. of water weight at my first weigh in...so that's my point of reference.

It's just hard for me to exercise these days...I do what I can, but walking for long distances and at a high speed are out, and high impact aerobics are out. I've been walking as far and as briskly as I can, and I've been doing these dance aerobic things that have 10 minute intervals...I've worked my way up to 20 minutes on "good" days. Bleh! Let's not even talk about drinking water...

I don't know if it's stress or my "condition" or what, but today, my right hand and leg are on fire! You may remember that those are the two limbs that I've been having the most trouble with...they feel like they're sunburned, but of course, there's nothing there. Craziness!!

OK...let's talk positives for awhile:

My kids are grand! Maddie has been going to the potty so well lately. I'm so proud of her. My friend Jamie and her daughter, Jada, are coming over from Indiana this Friday to stay with us, and we are going to take the girls to the Disney Princesses on Ice show Friday night! I'm so excited!! It should be a lot of fun (for the girls AND us - heehee)! I'll be sure to post pictures...

Mackenzie is SO funny these days. Just her actions...the way she tries to play peekaboo and act sly, the way she dances so funny, the way she tries to act just like Maddie. She's a lot of fun!

Thank GOD for my girls!!

That's it from here...I promise to get my act together and stop complaining/whining so much. Something HAS to give eventually.