I Think I'll Be OK!

I hope that I didn't alarm anyone with my last post. I was just having a *REALLY* bad few days...it just came to a point where I realized that I need to be proactive in getting rid of this JUNK in my mind.

There are a few of you who have been so wonderful with your e-mails and messages...you know who you are. It's SO wonderful to know that there are people who really care and want to help no matter how many miles are between us. I am blessed with such wonderful friends. Thank you!

I made a decision that I will talk to my Neurologist about how I've been feeling. He may end up sending me back to my regular doctor about this emotional stuff, in particular, but that is fine.

I have also made the decision to CONSCIOUSLY be happy. I've decided to SLOW DOWN in my life a bit. I don't HAVE to make it to an appointment RIGHT AT 1:00...if I make it there at 1:02, it's OK. I don't HAVE to work until bedtime every single night. I can pace myself, and I can tell my clients that they will have their things done before the deadlines, but they just might not get it a day or two after they give it to me. I don't HAVE to run myself ragged doing things that don't matter...having jewelry parties and Pampered Chef parties, etc. I can say NO. I WILL say NO.

I am also making the conscious choice to let things roll off my back. There is a situation right now in a buddy group that I am in where one or two people are picking on and saying very ugly things to another person. Those who know me well will tell you that I am FIERCELY loyal to my friends, and I will defend them until the end. I've had to make the choice to stay out of this as much as I want to defend my friend - she is a MS sufferer. It's not my fight...I don't need to make it my fight. I am better off skipping posts made by these people. Same with driving and politics...I'm not trying to race anyone or get in front of everyone who's going slower than I want them to, and I'm keeping the nightly news OFF to steer clear of the politics.

Finally...I am PRAYING. Praying that God "grants me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference."

In the few days that I've made these changes, I can already sense such a huge difference. My mood is lighter...things don't grind on my nerves as much. Don't get me wrong, I still have a ways to go until I can call myself completely serene, but don't we all?

Physically, I am about the same...my right hand, while a bit better, is still giving me problems, the fatigue is still a problem, dizziness, burning, etc.. Something new that started yesterday is that now my LEFT shoulder (everything until now has been on my right side) has began vibrating. It's a very strange and aggavating sensation. There is no pain...just vibrating. Hmmm...guess that's another one for the books. Sheesh!

So once again...THANK YOU for all of the love and support that you all give to me. None of it is ever unnoticed, believe me.